Dear Wicking

Dear Wicking,

As a special, super-duper Conscious Choking Adult Special, I bring you the SECOND blog of this wonderful day, devoted to YOU, Wicking.

As I was driving around running some errands today (buying ribs, in case you were wondering), I was thinking about the current fashion of you-sportswear. Those now omni-present fabrics that pull sweat straight off the skin and into the surrounding air, preventing uncomfortable damp shirts and - so they say - cooling the body.

The thing is, that doesn't seem to make full sense to me. Call me old-fashioned, but I am from a time when we were told that the purpose of perspiration (like the alliterative effect of that last phrase?) was to cool one's body down. I was told that dogs have to pant because they don't sweat. I had a science teacher who was rumored to be incapable of sweating, and thus at higher risk of overheating due to exertion or an extra-warm atmospheric temperature. Call me old-fashioned.

So, being this old-timer that I am, it seems completely counter-intuitive to want to eliminate the dampness caused by said perspiration while exercising. In my head, it would seem like that would be more likely to cause one to become increasingly warm. In fact, I imagine that it would produce one of those also-omni-present "endless cycles" where exercising caused a person to become overheated, thus triggering the sweating response. Then you would kick in, and that sweat would be pulled away from the skin, keeping it from being cooled. This would then cause the body to heat up even more, necessitating more sweat, and the cycle would continue until the athlete died from heat exhaustion.

Of course, last time I checked, this doesn't seem to be the end result. Which then suggests that my little theories are wrong. Which then begs the question: are my old-fashioned beliefs about the Purposeful Perspiration Process (PPP) just plain hog-wash? Or is there something I'm missing?

I would guess that I'm missing something. Probably something that a little bit of time spent at the Internet with Google would provide. But I'm not really willing to spend that time. Why? I don't really know. Maybe I'm just being stubborn. But I'm just not going to do it. Therefore, I am issuing a one-point bulletin to my Reader to answer this question for me.

And don't get me wrong, Wicking, I'm not writing this because I have something against you and want to see you less-present. Not at all. In fact, I generally wear a you-shirt when participating in athletic endeavours. However, I just need to know. It's like fully appreciating the fact that asparagus makes one's pee smell bad, but not knowing WHY it does that. Why does it do that? Why?

So until this mystery is solved, I will continue to make full use of your wonderful - alleged - abilities. With a smile. And once it is solved? I will continue to pee after eating asparagus.

So to speak.

Getting his Greens,
CVT

*Don't forget that this letter is the SECOND letter of the day. Mark this date on your calendar, for it is an historic event. Then enjoy the wonders of . . . Restlessness.