Dear "No One"

Dear "No One,"

I am writing this letter to you today, "No One," to appreciate my newest guilty pleasure (which, of course, is you - the song by Alicia Keys). This may seem a little bit weird coming from me (considering my relatively "refined" musical tastes), but it's not, "No One." It's not. Partly because you are such a wonderfully guilty-pleasure-inducing song. And partly because - at any given time - I have one or two slightly silly pop songs on the top of my musical-enjoyment list. Right now, that song is you, "No One."

As I type this, I am listening to you, of course. I've got you on a loop to keep me sufficiently inspired to do this letter up right. Because you are so very inspiring, indeed. Now, I had listened to you a few times in passing before my Spring Break - on the radio when I played music for the kids during class, usually. Never the full song - just a little bit before it changed to a new song. Or maybe I'd hear a little teaser as a car passed me by with you blasting on the stereo. That kind of thing.

But then I went to Hawaii, and I had me a nice little memory: my last full night before I fly out, I end up watching the sun set on a little picnic table in a random little park outside of a little random town East of Honolulu. The sun goes down, and I get in my car to take a night drive around a chunk of the island. I end up in this relatively-large town (for Oaha, at least), Kailua, and it's time to do some eating. As I have been doing the whole trip, I park in a central location and then wander around, letting my hormones and instincts decide what I am going to eat for dinner that night. I end up getting drawn in to a little Japanese-ish hole-in-the-wall called Ho-Jin, and I order a Poke Donburi dinner (I won't even try to explain Poke, as that's pretty much a separate letter in and of itself). To cut a longer story short, the dinner is delicious, and I'm just feeling good - and then you come on the radio, and I end up eating my dinner to your beat. And I am filled with this extraordinary sense of goodness (probably partially because of the fresh sashimi in the poke) that is just hard to explain. So I won't.

But the point is that is when you got me, "No One." When you officially became my newest guilty-pleasure song. And I think you might be one of my top guilty-pleasure songs of all time right now. You certainly beat out "I'm Coming Up" by Pink. You might be even with "Take On Me" by A-ha. I don't intend to divulge my whole ridiculous musical palette to the world right now, so I'll just leave it at that - you're near the top, for sure, though.

And I can't really explain it - why do I enjoy you so much? I have pretty exacting standards for my music (both in terms of lyrics and talent), and yet I could listen to you on an endless loop without issue (and am right this second, actually). I mean - of course you're catchy as Hell. And Alicia Keys' voice is pretty cool-sounding. I suppose it doesn't hurt that I have a little bit of a crush on her. But that's not what it is . . .

It's something of the "forbidden fruit" syndrome, I think. Getting to "indulge" in a popp-y, top-40 love song that talks about "always," "never," "forever," and actually claims that "everything's gonna be all right." There's even a weird synth-y violin-thing happening in the background, backing "oooooohhhh"-ing, and an "Oh-oh-oh-oh-ooooooh!" breakdown at the end. So perfectly formulaic that I can't help but love it. It's like the musical version of the Transformers movie or something like that. Or maybe more like "10,000 BC" - so utterly predictable and ridiculous that it blasts me right past criticism into innocent enjoyment.

And I have a crush on Alicia Keys. To the point where I just found myself thinking, "what if she happened to find this blog somehow - would this make her feel bad?" The funniest part is this crush has come almost ENTIRELY from you, "No One," making it into my guilty-pleasure-song list (and NOT because she's hot, famous, etc.). Maybe some day I'll have to do a tribute re-mix and put it up on YouTube.

Anyway. That's what I've got to say about all that, "No One." I thank you for giving me many many minutes of listening pleasure and random joy. And for inspiring (what feels like) my most deeply personal and revealing letter out of all 205 letters I have written in the past year. This one was deep, Man.

You and Me Together - Through the Days and Nights
I Don't Worry Cuz - Everything's Gonna' Be Alright
People Keep Talking - They Can Say What They Like
But All I Know Is: Everything's Gonna' Be Alright
You, You, YOU - Can Get In the Way of What I'm Feeling
You, You, YOU - Can Get in the Way of What I Feel
For You, "No One."

You,
CVT

*Who would have thought that your lyrics would better sum up my feelings on this matter than my whole letter?